Shamwow

STOP RIGHT NOW. Before you do anything, click on that video on the right. Watch it. All of it. If you blink, it doesn't count. That is the introduction to this blog. Welcome.

I've been wanting to move away from livejournal for a good long while now, but I've been reluctant since so much of my life is archived there. I've been writing in that mess for five years, almost a full quarter of my life. But livejournal is crap. That little box you use to update your entries has the worst layout I've ever seen, and it pisses me off whenever I try to do anything. It's like it just hasn't aged with the rest of the internet. But hey, now that I've migrated here, I can say "my blog" instead of "my livejournal", so I now feel slightly less like a prepubescent faggot (a title probably heightened more by this layout).

Chris just made a blog on here for his graphic design stuff, and he told me blogspot lets you import all your entries from a previous journal, which is what convinced me to come over. But the way to do it, you have to import an .xml file. So I do a little digging, and Livejournal lets you export in .xml! But then they make you export everything one month at a time. I went through each individual month for the past two years or so, saved them all, and uploaded them. Didn't work. I looked for the area where it says you can publish imported entries, and nothing was there. So Google helps me out and I come across this thing here. After some frustrated keyboard pounding, I finally get it to work, and it exports every single fucking entry. All 505 of them. Individually. I try to upload one. Doesn't work. So yeah. Fuck it.

Blogspot is great. It lets me put meaningless crap on the side there like that orgasmic Shamwow dance mix, and that embedded radio to my Last.fm library, and astronomy pictures, and art, and things that are awesomely useless. I could also give up space for ads if I really wanted to. And actually earn money for it! I won't do it though. The band will never sell out.

Also, shamwow.blogspot.com was already taken by some guy who has never written anything ever. GIVE IT UP YOU ASSHOLE.

Does anybody know a thing or two about HTML? I want to round the corners of the big dark blue box behind everything. And maybe put a big white box behind the text.

I want to avoid writing entries that contain no meaningful content, so here's a baby who's running for president.