I've been trying really hard to wrap my head around the way conservatives think. Having witnessed an insane amount of internet conversations between conservatives and liberals, and having lived with a neocon dad for most of my life, I feel comfortable in saying I have a fairly good grasp. The difficult part will be typing it all out coherently, because these fuckers are loving insane.
I'm going to use the word "conservative" a lot. Just to clarify, I'm not talking about the old school intelligent conservatives like Eisenhower, I'm talking about anybody who still calls himself a Republican in 2010. Let me get it out of the way now that both conservatives and liberals can fall into these things. But in the current political climate, not only do you see these a helluva lot more among Republicans, they almost seem required in order to be one.
1) Conservative morality is black and white.
I have never met a single strong conservative in my life who doesn't look at the world in this way. The world is divided into good and evil. There is no in between. If you're not with us, you're against us. Republicans are the good guys, and "they" are evil. "They" could be anyone conservatives want them to be.
Terrorists are evil motherfuckers. So are Nazis. Communists as well. Oftentimes, the line between "enemy" and "someone who disagrees with me" becomes blurred for these people. Progressives are evil. Democrats are evil. Liberals are evil. Look at Joseph McCarthy or Glenn Beck -- Liberals are enemies. So are communists. Therefore: liberals are communists.
This "extreme-good / extreme-evil" mentality breeds contempt towards anybody who doesn't think like they do. They are on the side of good and righteousness; how could anyone possibly disagree with good? Easy: liberals are either evil, or they are simply brainwashed by evil people (i.e., "the liberal media," or "Obama zombies," or "drinking the kool-aid," or "a college education").
2) Conservatives like stereotypes.
Racism, homophobia, and sexism could easily be mentioned. But since a liberal could also be any one of these things, I'll only focus on the way conservatives generally view liberals politically. From what I've seen, there are three liberal stereotypes among conservatives: 1) The hopelessly idealistic 60s hippie, placing flowers in the barrels of guns and dancing around naked and tripping on LSD, 2) the egghead elites, sippin' on their wine coolers, casually laughing at the peons beneath their feet, or 3) the violent radical loudmouths, spouting communist slogans, leading violent anti-government rallies, and preaching violent revolution. Or, the three stereotypes overlap, which is exactly how Barack Obama has been painted by the conservative media.
And conservatives, like Glenn Beck for example, love reinforcing these. Here, Beck demonstrates that all liberals are the same (and by "all liberals," I really mean the four or five dumbest stoners they could find). The first guy is so obviously an actor, that it's painful to watch. Beck's probably just jealous because he never went to college.
LIBERALS ARE SO DUM BUY MY BOOK LOL
3) Conservatives think like children.
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Moment of Zen - They Started It | ||||
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Conservatives literally think like children do. Something happened to them when they were younger that prevented their intellectual thinking from maturing. The previous two points should make this obvious, but let me elaborate.
Conservatives seem to be obsessed with following a single father figure. In the 90s, it was Rush Limbaugh. The last decade, it was George W. Bush. Now it's shaping up to be Glenn Beck. And above everyone, there's that all-encompassing Ronald Reagan. They think as a hivemind. If you don't conform and follow this person unquestionably, the group will happily call you names. In fact, they really seem to like namecalling.
They also really love hypocrisy:
- Rush Limbaugh believes drug users “ought to be accused and they ought to be convicted and they ought to be sent up," and yet in 2003, he admitted to being addicted to prescription painkillers.
- Conservatives are obsessed with the sanctity of marriage, and yet conservative voices like Rush Limbaugh, Larry Craig, Mark Foley, Newt Gingrich, John Ensign, Ted Haggard, or Mark Sanford don't really seem to care about getting divorced numerous times, cheating on their wives, or having sex with men. They're the party of family values.
- Conservatives seem to complain all the time about bias in "the mainstream media," and then they don't give a shit that Fox News is heavily biased. And Fox being the #1 news channel in the country makes it the mainstream media.
- They criticize Barack Obama for being some sort of "celebrity" who liberals follow unquestionably (which they don't), when they fail to realize that the people they listen to the most don't hold any public office at at all, but are celebrities from the radio and TV, like Beck, Limbaugh, Hannity, O'Reilly, or Palin.
Watch this, it really drives the point home.
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Even Better Than the Real Thing | ||||
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4) Conservatives believe the end always justifies the means.
This really needs no explanation. Republicans take things way too far, way too often.
- Conservatives support torture as long as you don't call it torture because that would make them feel bad
- Conservatives don't believe in the rule of law
- A conservative administration broke into the Democratic National Committee Headquarters
- A conservative "activist" tampered with the phone lines of a Democratic Senator's office.. He was a hero to the right before this happened.
- Conservative politicians believe their own careers are more important than the well-being of the country
- A conservative radio host unabashedly encouraged nationwide voter fraud
Politics is a game to them. Win the game at all costs. "The enemy" is just as evil, so hell, why not?
5) Conservatives are terrified of everything.
This right here is where it all comes to fruition. Conservatives are so militant against gay marriage because they're subconsciously insecure about their own sexuality. Conservatives don't care about the destruction of personal liberties when combating terrorism because no cost is too great so long as they can feel safe.
Conspiracy theories are becoming very common, even among those in the mainstream. Conspiracy theories are brought on by fear. If they don't understand something (liberal thinking), it frightens them, and so their minds make things up to give them explanation. This is seen in the tea baggers, where belief that Barack Obama is a secret Muslim, a secret Kenyan, a secret terrorist, a secret communist, or a secret Nazi, all run rampant. Then people die. And the lies continue.
Glenn Beck is significantly responsible for much of the fear. Beck never came into the picture until Barack Obama became president, and once Barack Obama became president, this conspiracy hysteria exploded.
- Beck has claimed ACORN is capable of killing him
- The global warming "movement" is about population control
- Sotomayor's appointment to the Supreme Court is more evidence of a Marxist "hostile takeover" of the United States
- "I'm not saying that Obama has an enemies list, but I wouldn't put it past him either"
- The president is purposely tanking the economy so teenagers will be driven into ACORN and Americorps
- Beck claims there is "evil at play" in the Obama administration, but he is "on to them," suggests they're trying to destroy him
- After stating, "I am not saying that Barack Obama is a fascist," Beck compares auto bailout to actions of German companies "in the early days of Adolf Hitler"
Beck has stated that his biggest political influence is Cleon Skousen, an anti-communist conspiracy theorist during the Cold War, who's a written wide variety of books, the topics ranging from the coming New World Order, to Mormonism. Beck has said Skousen's words are "divinely inspired."
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